I mean if you got kids involved stop fighting with them so that you can work out you the practicalities. Brad: Today’s topic of conversation as how long does it take you to get a divorce? And what I’ve asked you from before you make it seem like it can be like a very, very long time. You just can’t answer that question especially when you’re dealing with children, but everyone wants to know what. Let’s say basically I’m the husband and I saw all right I want a divorce so when I file for it how do you even start all of that? They don’t want it to drag out because emotions, money, time and all of that stuff. I mean if someone’s having an affair or someone’s isn’t in love with anyone anymore, it’s a fact, it’s just the way it is.
Attorney Brad Tengler and Geoff Carter discuss the factors involved in the length of divorce litigation, including how getting along with your ex can save you a lot of time and money and make the divorce process go more quickly. It is a source of information for people suffering the effects of divorce or who have ended long-term relationships. Really the business side of your relationship is just going to be your relationship for the next number of years as the kids grow up because if you don’t, it will extend the process for the divorce and it will obviously incur more [inaudible ]. Like I’m guessing when people do it not only do you have all of that time and things you had together I can house together, cars together, animals together, finances together and then you have to figure out babysitters.
If you need legal advice please retain an attorney in your own jurisdiction. You have to figure out who’s getting full-time custody or are you splitting.
Brad: Good evening folks and welcome to Divorce Talk Radio. I mean that’s a lot of stuff to figure out than when you had it all together, but I understand like it just don’t work out. What are we going to do when people want to go out of state? So do they get a hold of you if somebody like you would represent them?
This is attorney Brad Tengler here in the studio with Geoff Carter. Brad: Sure, it’s a ton of stuff to figure out and there is a process for doing it. When you or I want to go out of state with one of the kids, how are we going to handle all of those situations and this people need to actually fit down in a structured setting usually and have conversations about that. Now I have seen where couples are soon to be ex couples come in and they have already figured out what they’re going to do for holidays and what they’re going to do for the summer or what they’re going to do for regular parenting time for each parent during the week. A lot of times there’s too many emotions that are going on, they haven’t thought through all of those things and that’s normal. Brad: What that means is that we tried to come to agreements like a marital settlement agreement or a joint parenting agreement. Brad: In absent agreement, judges have to make decisions. Brad: We’re located at 515 North Court Street in Rockford, Illinois.
And for instance one of the things which is common in our counties in Illinois is that by ordinance people are required to go to mediation to deal with child related issues. So it’s a process, the go to mediation, you talk about it, you figure out things that you agree about. Just because someone would sign doesn’t mean that they can hold you hostage in your marriage. We serve the Rockford area and the greater Chicago area and our number is (815) 997-5200.
Mediation is a process, it doesn’t happen overnight and people oftentimes don’t want to be talking to their exes but when kids are involved they have to be willing to talk to their exes because they’ve got all of these child related issues they need to talk about. There’s usually things that you disagree about which means you might need to go back to mediation to talk about it again because you’re only given initially only about an hour of time. It has nothing to do with incarceration though but… What people have to be aware of when they’re going through the divorce process especially when they have children is that they first of all should do their best to try to come to agreements with their soon-to-be ex-spouse. It means practically speaking it’s going to take you longer to get the divorce. Brad: Or irreconcilable differences and you have to live separate and apart for two years in order to obtain divorce by means of irreconcilable differences unless it’s both parties sign, waive that time period and agreed to six months. Brad: So if it’s a year and six months later and somebody has started dating someone else, you might have to wait six more months to get that divorce. Geoff: All right Brad, I learned a lot about how long, times and a lot of people ask that question about how long is custody and how long does divorces takes. And then tried to go back, try to work those things out and if you can’t work those things out then you’ve got to press forward with the litigation. Geoff: What would people incarcerated have rights and everything? Brad: If you can still get a divorce is if your soon-to-be ex-spouse is incarcerated. It’s going to save the money; it’s going to save them time. Geoff: Okay so the other question is not as crazy as the last one is. Geoff: But that can also make you miserable on somebody that wants to get remarried or something like that. Unless you prove up the divorce on other grounds and that’s cruelty, adultery, abandonment, alcoholism, all the other grounds in the statue. It’s like you said, the custody thing and also money. And obviously there are exceptional cases I just saw in this news article in Connecticut divorce that it has been litigated for the past 10 years and the parties are still not divorced. Brad: Well first of all Geoff I’m going to tell your current girlfriend that you just said you don’t want to get married so you’re in trouble. What’s the first thing you do I mean obviously people figure this all of the time, but I mean do… are ready go to like both go to an attorney and kind of both meet for lunch and say all right, starting Tuesday we’re going to start. To make sure you cover all of your steps but also do it within a timely manner, is there a certain process you would maybe suggest like it is things you would skip or something like that? And so the divorce process can be anywhere from days two months period of time to a two-month period of time to a sometimes two period of time. Brad: You have to file a petition for a dissolution of marriage. So when people whenever come to me and say something like well call we handle this entirely outside of court? And I guess that’s what I’m thinking about in particular, divorces with children usually require a great deal of time. It’s probably not something that should happen overnight. Geoff: So I guess the question is what are some other steps to make it a faster is, not necessarily a faster, but a better divorce I guess? Before signing papers you have to have agreements or you have to have a hearing in front of the judge in order for a judge to rule the things that you disagree about it. But you have to file a petition for a divorce and that is begins to process. So that begins the process, but that’s only the beginning of the process and then you have to deal with the financial issues and if there are children involved you have to deal with all of the child related issues. Need to move on with their lives and relationships, but you’ve got to work out all of the child related issues and it is usually difficult and unwise to do that quickly. Brad: Or you can get an attorney, both of you can get an attorney, an attorney never can represent both of you at the same time although sometimes one of the parties and the relationship does not have an attorney.